childhood?

Rida bad, bad girl. Rida needs to be punished.
Yes.

To err...

Perhaps when your sins keep revisiting you, it is a good thing, because it is a reminder of the dark times in case you have forgotten them; a slap on the face, or a dunking of your head in cold water, a look into the mirror showing your inner self - a look through your own eyes. This, certainly, will help you not stray away to the darkness again. Painful reminders, but serving a good purpose.

Peace.

Busy for so long, so infinitely long, that things have been unthinkingly suppressed. This I should have foreseen...the slightest hint of room in my mind to think, and the world would turn upside-down. So much came tumbling out all at once that at first my mind was unable to numb me from the shock and save me from the tumultuous confusion that followed. Then I spent three agonizing 24-hour sessions sorting through the mess: feeling, thinking, tearing, despairing, and being a general robot. Now I am not calm - I am simply numb. It's what I'm best at. And of course, it means I've shelved most of the garbage again, and a bit of provocation will lead to a meltdown. So be it. Everything I cannot control.
Numbness breeds indifference. I long for those days when I could be completely numb. But somewhere along the way someone broke through my defenses and now totality is something I can no longer achieve =/ I am bitter. I have nowhere to go, nowhere to spread or share. When ever before have I felt so helpless? So...alone. I sorted and sifted through card after card, face after face, and found no one. Hence, the armor is coming on up. I'm building back my walls again. I might answer if you knock hard enough. Otherwise, I'm shelled.

Jan'na chahtay ho?

La waris lash ki tadfeen ka tareeqa
1. Lash ka postmortem honay say pehle phone krein.
2. Murg report, naql report aur lash ki 4 adad taza tasaweer.
3. 2 adad constable humrah.
4. Dopaihr aik bajay k baad lash wasool nahi ki jaye gi.